Book Report

Last year was my year for reading again. I used to love reading as a child but since I had kids, my own reading has been very limited and sporadic. So I made a conscious effort to restart the habit. Goodreads is a great website to help keep track of both the books I read and the ones I want to read! 2012 was basically a year for fluff ~ easy-to-read, not-too-stimulating, quick reads. Actually, no book is "quick" for me anymore, but you get the idea. I was just trying to get back into the habit and the joy of reading.

However, while I still intend to read fluff in 2013, I have decided to try and implement some 'real' books. Non-fiction, make-you-think books. Preferably ones that can help me out somehow in my my life goals. Books that have ideas that I may want to refer back to. Most of my books I get from the library so I will make my notes here...



"The Five Love Languages of Children" by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell, MD

Description from their website: To be their best, children need to feel loved. But if you and your child speak different love languages, your affection might get lost in translation, affecting the child’s attitude, behavior, and development. Dr. Gary Chapman’s groundbreaking Five Love Languages series has helped millions of couples communicate love more clearly, and Dr. Ross Campbell M.D. has applied the innovative system to children as well. The 5 Love Languages of Children gives practical suggestions for learning how your children interpret love and creating a sense of security in which they can thrive.

I really did like this book. In fact, I may go ahead and buy myself a copy to keep around. And I hope to implement some of the suggestions the authors' recommend. I also intend to read some of their other books. 

Basically, the five love languages are: Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Gifts, and Acts of Service. The definitions are pretty much what you would expect them to be. The premise is one of these languages is your child's MAIN love language and the one that will fill up their "love tank." Though you need to use ALL of the languages, you should concentrate on making sure you use the MAIN one often enough to satisfy their need for it. Also, when disciplining them, don't use the MAIN one as punishment.

There is also a chapter on anger - specifically how to teach them to manage it. This one will be hard for me. I don't think I'm that great at managing my own anger. Also, I spent several year in a state of depression (not clinical) and one thing I read later was that women who are depressed tend to shy away from confrontation and I can tell I haven't gotten over that particular symptom so dealing with my children's anger in a calm, rational way is going to be very, very difficult for me. (This is why I may buy this book, so I can refer back to this chapter!)

In the back of the book, they give you action plans for each love language as well as other things. Physical Touch I can handle. Words of Affirmation may be hard but I think I can do it. Quality Time will be tricky just because I never seem to have enough time for anything. One thing it recommends is to spend one hour a week with each child. Well, I have 4 children ~ however, I'm going to make this a goal for this year but I'm going to start out with every 2 weeks and see how it goes. Gifts ~ this one bothers me for some reason. Maybe just because I'm trying to get rid of inconsequential clutter? Maybe I don't want them to be spoiled and expect gifts for every occasion? I don't know but I'm afraid one of my children may have this as her main love language so we'll see how it goes. Acts of Service I think I have down. I actually need to start training the children in some of these things so they can become fully functioning adults. Luckily, there is always something you can do for somebody to make them feel loved.

How to determine each child's love language will be the trick. I need to keep track of the ways they express love to me and other people. Keep track of what they ask for. Look at any patterns of complaints. I can also give them "either/or" questions to try and determine which love language fits them best. 

Here's where I guess my kids' love languages now and, hopefully, in a few weeks I will either confirm or correct them:

13-year-old boy: Physical touch
9-year-old girl: she's hard but I think Quality Time
7-year-old girl: Gifts or Words of Affirmation
5-year-old boy: may be too young to tell yet (according to the book) but I'm going with Quality Time for now



Oh! ~ just saw there are free "study guides" on their website. Going to have to check these out!

Coffee Fudge

We recently had "Thank-mas" at my Mom & Dad's house.

I brought some "Coffee Fudge" that I made for the first time. My younger daugher (the one who likes almost everything) and I really liked it. Everybody else wanted regular old fudge. Oh, well...here's the recipe anyway. I got this from Lynn's Kitchen Adventures.

Coffee Fudge

• 2 cups sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, cut into chunks
• 2 tablespoons instant coffee granules
• 1/8 teaspoon salt
• 1- 5 ounce can evaporated milk
• 12 large marshmallows, cut into pieces (or use 120 mini marshmallows)
• 1 cup semi sweet chocolate chips
• 1 teaspoon of vanilla

1. Line a loaf pan with foil and grease. Set aside. (You can also use an 8×8 pan lined with foil.)
2. In a pan combine sugar, butter, coffee granules, salt, milk, and marshmallows.
3. Bring to a boil and continue cooking over medium high heat until it reaches soft ball stage, which is 234 degrees, on a candy thermometer. You will need to stir this to keep it from burning.
4. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla and chocolate chips until melted.
5. Pour mixture into lined loaf pan. Cool completely or overnight and let cut into squares.